One Stray Pea

So, remember when I said this town was ridiculous for the onion delay? Today, we have ourselves a new, equally bizarre, produce delay. A watermelon truck overturned on an entrance ramp from I-75 to I-74 and that’s just dumb. It’s a sharp turn, you can see that its a sharp turn, there’s no reason to roll your truck, just slow down! I can’t even begin to express how ridiculous I think produce these produce delays are, onions, watermelons…I sincerely hope that our next produce delay is something delicious like pineapple. No, better than fruit, I hope our next delay involves farm animals, I really liked that time we had the cow delay (true story).

UPDATE: I was sent an actual news article concerning the watermelons, and behold, a quote from CPD, “We have watermelons all over the road,”. I can’t get enough of the train wreck that is this town. The coroner has apparently been called to the scene, so I might be a little more understanding if the driver wrecked because he was dying. If he died because he wrecked, well then my simply will be waning.

UPDATE (pt. 2): The same person who sent me the news article alerted me to the fact that it takes 6 CPD cruisers to sit on an entrance ramp and guard squashed watermelons. Do you want to take a guess at how many cruisers will show up if your house gets robbed? One. Just one. Watch out for watermelons, they’re feisty. Meanwhile, back at the ghetto ranch, every felon in Cincinnati is running wild, stealing $1 bills, bowling balls and Jeep Cherokees.

Filed under: Cincinnati Police Department, Life in Cincinnati on July 5th, 2007