HA! We Got You Good!

I knew the news would get better. Yesterday I turned on the tv at 11:00 a.m. to watch Cincinnati Police officers wandering around Interstate 71. There was a bank robbery in Evendale, right over by my local fabric retailer and the bank teller slipped a GPS device in with the money. So police shut down the highway where they were following the signal. Now, if this criminal was intelligent, he would’ve thrown the GPS device out. I was REALLY hoping that police would follow the signal into a pile of pop cans and gravel on the side of the road. Aaron was hoping it was tied to a squirrel. In the end, it was still in the money bag and the thieves went quietly and looked like Cincinnati’s second dumbest criminals (second to my house robbers), but they were in a pick up truck with Kentucky plates. You know education pays there right? Leave it to Kentucky to bring the stupid.

There was a jail riot at the Hamilton County Justice Center last month. I don’t know how I missed this in the news, however 4 prisoners were indicted for aggravated rioting. They apparently jammed their cells doors with pieces of books and checker boards, then clogged up toilets which proceeded to overflow and flood the first and second floors of the jail. Then they taunted officers when they tried to gain access to the cells. Wait, let me get this straight, you clogged the toilet in your cell and then proceeded to taunt officers while you danced in your own urine and feces? Perfect sense. One prisoner was also charged with aggravated menacing after he “threatened to kill one officer, sexually assault his sister and kill his family.�? That earned him some pepper spray to the face.

Finally, a high school rivalry has led to suspected arson. Apparently someone set fire at Taft High School, but only to the area that holds the football uniforms..all three sets. This left the football team with nothing to wear for their game on Friday night. Colerain was nice enough to donate uniforms. Adding insult to injury, they lost Friday night by 1 point. How’s the salt in that wound boys? Who sets a fire to win a football game? What ever happened to the good old fashioned Tonya Harding-ing? Yeah, I did say that. I hope that doesn’t earn me a whack to the knees.