Crazies Go Crazy & Al Gore Interrupts My Life

Thanks to the weather, I’ve had nosebleeds pretty consistently the last few days. It’s getting really old, that constant taste of blood in my mouth. So, let’s talk about stuff..

So there was a shooting in East Price Hill last night. A resident of some apartment complex flagged down a police officer at 1:30 in the morning, saying he heard a gunshot in the apartments. Hmm, if I hear a gunshot in my building I would probably call 911. I most likely wouldn’t run outside like “I’ll flag down a cop, and hope this shooter doesn’t gun me down on the street while I stand there�?. Here’s my favorite part: witness say they didn’t hear anything out of the ordinary. Well, that’s because gun shots in East Price Hill aren’t out of the ordinary! I remember my sophomore year of college taking this class that had a community service component to it, and it was in East Price Hill. Totally ghetto. We had to come up with a plan to improve East Price Hill for this class as well, and I agreed with the guy who yelled “burn it down and start over.�? Because there is nothing else to do besides wait for them all the kill each other off.

One mentally ill man kills another in Butler County. Figures, I prepare to move back to Butler County and the crazies just go crazy. Then, in what I thought to be a show of bad journalistic taste, NBC local news shows pretty much the entire arraignment on the news. Um, Napoleon Dynomite’s twin can barely speak, they had to put up subtitles. The judge had to ask him 3 times if he understood that he was being charged with murder. He says yes, and then later is like “garble garble garble�? which was subtitled “I didn’t do anything.�? It was kind of sad to watch this guy cry to his mom that he wasn’t going to leave her, and then cry all over the bailiffs. I didn’t find this arraignment to be news necessary. The prosecutor actually released a statement that he doesn’t believe the man will be found mentally competent to stand trial. That’s also unnecessary, because if you saw the news you’d be like “they’ll just send him to another mental institution.�? I guess it gives the prosecutor something to do.

Oh Sweet Jesus! More fun in Butler County. 3 kids bring a gun to Hopewell junior high. Now, of the 3 junior highs in West Chester (Lakota Ridge, Hopewell & Liberty) Hopewell is the most ghetto. It’s on the older side of West Chester, and I used to call it Hopplewell because I had a friend in the band there, and on some band award they misspelled Hopewell and made it Hopplewell. Now that I think about it, Hopplewell is appropriate because as far as West Chester standards go, Hopewell is equal to Hopple street in it’s ghettoness. Anyways, back to the gun issue, these kids thought maybe they would commit some crimes after school, burglarize a house or something. Until one kid decides to tell a teacher because his conscious got the better of him. His conscious got him & his friends felony charges and some friendly time at the Butler County Juvenile Detention Center. I’m telling you, I’m moving back and Butler County is going nuts. It’s like the crap is just following me around. There’s going to be a body in the river in Hamilton before too long.

I’m glad that I am not traveling out of the airport today. Flights will be delayed for the president, so he can come rub elbows with less exclusive politicians here in Indian Hill. Now, when they mean delayed, they seriously mean delayed..and this is how I know. 5 years ago, just before the first election that Bush won, my brother got married..in Iowa. So, here’s a run down of the morning: we drove my brother & sister in law to the airport at 7 in the morning, and I vomit in the bathroom. THEN when I get to the airport to go home, my flight has been canceled. I am raging pissed. Then I have to fly to St. Louis, have a layover and fly to Cincinnati. It get’s so much better. I was flying TWA, and in Des Moines they gave me, my grandma & aunt an $18 food voucher and some TWA tickets. I yelled at the ticket guy “TWA..the one that crashes?? You are valuing my life at $6…that’s just great�?. My aunt was very embarrassed, which made it even better. So anyways..St. Louis. It was TWA…AND a prop jet. What the crap is that all about?? So while we are sitting on this plane for well over an hour, they announce “We are having serious delays because Al Gore was here and we have to wait for his plane to get X amount of miles away from the airport before anyone else can take off�? That’s dumb. I mean, he was only the Vice-President, he’s already in second place, this is all annoying.