Green Bay Packers vs. Dallas Cowboys
This is a highly anticipated game. Sure, the Cowboys have more big names…but the Packers have a magical unicorn steering their ship!! That bein said, magical or not, I don’t think the Packers will edge this one out. However, the Cowboys did almost lose to Buffalo. Whatever, Cowboys by 10.

San Diego Chargers vs. Kansas City Chiefs *AFC West Match-up*
Dear Phil Rivers, don’t tell the fans to shut up when they’re booing. The Chargers aren’t fan favorites these days. Backtracking to say you “love�? the fans later on, not believable. Don’t be so whiney. And perhaps beat the Chiefs. Seriously, the Chiefs lost to the Raiders. You should be booing yourselves if you blow this one, even at Arrowhead. Chargers by 14.

San Francisco 49’ers vs. Carolina Panthers
Seriously, no matter how bad the Panthers season is going it won’t be as bad as losing to the 49’ers. Even the Rams beat the 49’ers. Even old Vinny can stave off the 49’ers defense. Heck, that rookie the fans have been cheering for might even be able to hold down the fort of this one. Panthers by 7 (hey, they’re the better team, but not by much)

Atlanta Falcons vs. St. Louis Rams
Here’s a crappy game I hope I’m not subjected to! Joey and his bird friends take on the Rams. Luckily Bobby Petrino plans on returning to the Falcons next season, so DeAngelo Hall can disrespect him a little more? Who knows. This game shouldn’t even be broadcast it’s so lame. Falcons by 10. I mean..they scored on the Colts, so they’re probably better than the Rams.

Jacksonville Jaguars vs. Indianapolis Colts
This should be a good game. The Jaguars look alright this season, and the Colts are bouncing back from some pretty big injuries. I think that the Colts will be able to pull it together this week and the Jaguars will falls short. Colts by 14.

Seattle Seahawks vs. Philadelphia Eagles
Well, the Eagles are back to McInjured. I’m sure that’ll work out well for them. You know, because A.J. Feeley helped them be the most competitive team to play New England this year. He threw for 345 yards against a robot defense, so naturally Andy Reid would bench him. Go Hasslebeck. Seahawks by 7.

New York Jets vs. Miami Dolphins *AFC East Match-up*
I think this is the battle of the worst of the worst! This is Miami’s best chance yet. Sure, they only let the Steelers win 3-0, but that was more because of the rain than because of their immense talent. I am actually not sure that the Jets can contain the Dolphins. But more than that, I’m hoping for a Dolphins perfect season. Jets by 3..or less. Although..I kinda hope the Dolphins win so the Bengals won’t be able to give them their first win of the season…you know.

Buffalo Bills vs. Washington Redskins
I think there’s drama all around with this game. We all know about the Sean Taylor drama, but Buffalo has QB drama again with Trent Edwards getting the start and JP Losman getting a whole lot of nothing. I think that the Redskins will bounce back and pull out a win. Not to mention that their defense (with or without #21) will over-power that Buffalo offense. Redskins by 13.

Detroit Lions vs. Minnesota Vikings
Now, the Lions will not drop 4 in a row. It’s just not going to happen. It’s about as likely as the Vikings winning two in a row. Jon Kitna has to avoid the lynching and start winning some games. Those Detroit fans aren’t exactly faithful, they’re already looking for a Canadian football team to love. Lions by 17.

Houston Texans vs. Tennessee Texans *AFC South Match-up*
The Texans need to get back on track if they have a chance of making the playoffs. However, they have their own off-field drama with their Chris Henry. We understand, Tennessee. However, the Texans are already over their early season glory days. Vince and friends by 7.

Denver Broncos vs. Oakland Raiders *AFC West Match-up*
The Broncos suffered a disappointing loss this past week at the hands of the even more disappointing Rex Grossman…yeah, that’s right. Pathetic boys. But I doubt they will submit themselves to further embarrassment by losing to the Raiders as well. Broncos by 10.

Cleveland Browns vs. Arizona Cardinals
While the Cardinals suck, they own the AFC north for some reason. I don’t understand, with all the drama in Arizona (at QB) you’d think they’d suck more. However, they are the most inconsistent team in the NFL. I’m picking the Browns by 3.

New York Giants vs. Chicago Bears
Oh Eli, what happened last week? I saw about 10 seconds of the game and I managed to see you throw TWO interceptions? That’s gross. Eli, we don’t like when you channel your inner Rex Grossman. Speaking of Rexie, I guess we’ll be seeing him again this week. Fantastic. Giants by 10.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs. New Orleans Saints *NFC South Match-Up*
Can’t I just leave this at Tampa Bay by 17? Do I need the commentary here? All I have to say is, The Rams…the RAMS. That’s why the Saints won’t beat the Buccaneers. Sorry Drew fans, maybe next week.

Cincinnati Bengals vs. Pittsburgh Steelers *AFC North Match-up*
So Pittsburgh isn’t going to re-sod the field for this week’s match up? Classy. Did they not see the field last week? You can’t aerate that. Whatever. For some reason the Bengals enjoy winning at Heinz field more than PBS. I don’t quite understand..oh wait, yes I do. There’s something about shoving a Terrible Towel in a toothless mouth…I get it. Bengals by 7. Stop laughing..haters.

New England Patriots vs. Baltimore Ravens
BOOOOOOOOORING! I don’t care if the Patriots almost lost to the Eagles or not (which by the way, should be totally embarrassing). While the Ravens will lose, kudos to Samari Rolle for making his epilepsy public. That’s fairly courageous, considering that seizures are a serious deal. I fully expect the Patriots winning streak to continue over Kyle Boller or Steve McOld (whoever is playing), Pats by 21. Trust me, Bill won’t let them win by less to such a third rate team.

Green Bay Packers vs. Detriot Lions *NFC North Match-Up*

Now, when I first saw that this was the Thanksgiving day game I thought, “Another LAME Lions game on Thanksgiving.�? However, this could turn out to be a decent watch. The Packers are red hot and the Lions (with the Kitna promise) have dropped 2 in a row. Will they drop 3? Probably. But at least it has the potential to be a decent game. Green Bay by 7.

 New York Jets vs. Dallas Cowboys

Now THIS is a lame Thanksgiving game. Will the 2-8 Jets beat the 9-1 Cowboys? Fat chance. I know, they beat the Steelers, but the Steelers are jerks, they get cocky and then they lose. I don’t think it will take a lot of defense to kill the Jets in this one. Cowboys by 17.

 Indianapolis Colts vs. Atlanta Falcons

The injured Colts get a break this week. Seriously, the Falcons are ridiculous. Big Byron is out this week, not because of his ankle, but because of a bruise tailbone. I can’t roll my eyes enough at the QB situation in Atlanta. I think this game is going to be more like practice than anything else. Colts by 10. Yeah, it’s practice but they’re still banged up.

 Oakland Raiders vs. Kansas City Chiefs *AFC West Match-Up*

The Raiders won’t win at Arrowhead..that’s all you need to know. Yes, I know that Larry Johnson is done and Priest Holmes retired (that was quick), but the Raiders still won’t win. They can’t pull it together long enough to make consecutive plays, and by the 4^th quarter they generally don’t know which way to run. Pitiful. Chiefs by 10.

 New Orleans Saints vs. Carolina Panthers *NFC South Match-Up*

The Saints gave the Rams their first win of the season and now I fear that they might give the Panthers their fifth. Seriously, can the Saints pull it together? The last time I went against them they won just to spite me..and the Panthers are putting a grandpa in at quarterback, so I’m picking Saints by 3.

 Houston Texans vs. Cleveland Browns

I sincerely hope that the Texans put an end to all of this Cleveland winning foolishness. Really, just who does Derek Anderson think he is with all of this winning anyways? While I HOPE the Texans pull off the win, I don’t think it’s likely. Browns by 7.

 Seattle Seahawks vs. St. Louis Rams *NFC West Match-Up*

The Rams are on a winning streak! Too bad it’s about to end. Mike Holmgren will have a stroke if the Seahawks lose to the Rams and we all know it. Matt Hasslebeck will lead his team by 20.

 Washington Redskins vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers

The Redskins are 5-5, and supposedly had a great defense. I think they can take the Buccaneers, basically because the Buccaneers only look fantastic in their own dismal division. Redskins by 7.

 Tennessee Titans vs. Cincinnati Bengals

Cincinnati, pull it together! I’m not kidding. I’m going to pick the Titans this week simply because common sense says, “If you can’t beat Kurt Warner and his lame-armed fling, you won’t beat Vince Young, the new Michael Vick�?. Maybe Carson won’t throw 4 interceptions this week, and maybe Chad Johnson won’t fumble on the 10 yard line. Tennessee by 7. BOO!

 Buffalo Bills vs. Jacksonville Jaguars

Now here’s a much more even match for the Bills. Last week New England made them look more like a D-3 college team. Yeah JP, it was THAT bad. I think Marv Levy actually left the stadium before the end of the first quarter. I don’t think the Bills will beat the Jags though. They think they’ll make the wild card this year, but that’s because they are dumb. Jags by 14.

 Minnesota Vikings vs. New York Giants

I don’t think the Vikings have a chance if Adrian Peterson doesn’t come back this week.  The Giants have been awesome this season (except against the Cowboys..and I don’t want to talk about that). Eli has found faith in his laser rocket arm. Giants by 14.

 San Francisco 49’ers vs. Arizona Cardinals *NFC West Match-Up*

The Cards are on a winning streak and the 49’ers gave the Rams one of their two wins this season. This means that I don’t think SF has a chance in Arizona. Kurt Warner is apparently amazing when he’s in the process of being tackled. But maybe that’s only against Cincinnat. Cardinals by 13.

 Denver Broncos vs. Chicago Bears

Will Brian Griese make a comeback this week? I mean, Rex had a stellar week against the Seahawks, he didn’t throw a single interception. He didn’t throw any touchdowns either, and we see how that worked out for Chicago. This game is a sort of lateral move. Two teams fighting to shake their sucky reputations. I think the Bears will pull this one out though, Chicago by 7…even if Rex plays.

 Baltimore Ravens vs. San Diego Chargers

Hmm, two dumb coaches. Who will win? Well, I’m going to go with the Chargers because of the injuries and lack of back-up quarterback talent on the Ravens sidelines. Norv Turner’s team will win, but not because of his nuggets of knowledge. Go Chargers, by 10.

 Philadelphia Eagles vs. New England Patriots

Big surprise, Donovan got injured last week. Well, with McInjured being day to day and the other player in their offense, Brian Westbrook being listed on the injured list this should be just as pitiful as the last Patriots game. Lame! Oh look, Tom Brady is on the injured list for like the 27^th straight week. As if we believe that Bill, how stupid do you think we are? Stop being lame, just wear your sweatshirt and stop lying. Pats by…I dunno…42.

 Miami Dolphins vs. Pittsburgh Steelers

ANOTHER lame Monday Night Game, who is in charge of choosing these? I have never cheered for the Dolphins more than I am right now. Do you have any idea how excited I would be to see them blow their perfect season against the Steelers? Not that I think it will happen. I mean, Mike Tomlin has some “significant injuries�? this week but I doubt it will cramp NFL Diddy’s style. Steelers by like 21 or something. Let’s be honest, the Dolphins weren’t even competitive against the Eagles even with Donovan injured!

So earlier today I decided that I was going to start posting blogs logging all of the good things that Chad Johnson does in a game. Why? Because the media (not just in Cincinnati, but national media as well) is dead set on making Chad the new NFL whiner. Randy Moss and Terrell Owens are both finally pacified this year, so there goes that NFL whining. The media tried to bait Matt Leinart, but then he got injured so there went that chance. There was some bickering in Buffalo as JP Losman watched his job slipping away but the media realized that no one cares about Buffalo. Not even Buffalo. So that left Chad Johnson. And the media attacked. And it was lame.

So began my log:

Chad Johnson makes a big catch up the middle

Chad Johnson throws a block for Kenny Watson to get an extra few steps. That’s right kids, throws a block. Because he can.

Chad Congratulates TJ on his touchdown – Not pouting about not getting the TD pass (as the media would have you believe). You know, being a team player.

Not Chad related but the Bengals just returned the kick off for a touchdown…Glenn Holt…the Bills had outstanding special teams by the way, Glenn Holt only ran passed two guys in blue. You know, he’s not even all that fast, I mean, he’d look like a puma next to me, but out there, he looks a little like Eli, only with braids.

Look, Chad Johnson is congratulating Glenn Holt on the sidelines. Again, team player.

Chad stays in bounds to make a great catch, then face plants into the ground. Then, like a champ, gets up.

Oh Chad, doesn’t make a catch, and now the announcers are tearing into him as if he’s done nothing but roll around in the middle of the field all game. I hate announcers. Now they’re psychoanalyzing Chad. Since when did sports announcer qualify these boobs as psychiatrists? Have I mentioned that I loathe announcers?

Oh, now it looks bad. Chad is down and people are praying. This doesn’t look good.

</end log>

So there you have it, my log. Now it looks like a sympathy vote but really, I’m going to be the media outlet that doesn’t pit Chad against the world. Does anyone else remember Corey Dillon? This town doesn’t need anymore of that kind of lameness.

Cincinnati Bengals vs. Buffalo Bills
If Cincinnati can’t beat the Bills, I might have to become a Dolphins fan. However, we’ve all seen what the Bills can do with 5 turnovers. Not much. Plus, J.P. Losman is making his comeback. I know, the Bills have won 3 of their last 4, but to be fair, 2 of those wins were against the Jets. I pick Cincinnati by 10.

 Denver Broncos vs. Detroit Lions
The Broncos will climb down out of the mountains this week and face a surprisingly awesome Detroit Lions. Who are these Lions, and where did they come from? I really thought Jon Kitna was kidding with that 10 wins comment, but he might’ve been serious. I’m not sure where to go with this one, I think it’ll be close. Jason Elam is deadly with less than 5 seconds on the clock. Broncos by 3 (only because they are AFC).

 Green Bay Packers vs. Kansas City Chiefs
I believe Brett Favre has turned back the hands of time. I also believe he can win in Kansas City this week. Kansas City might have a better running game but I don’t know that their defense can contain the might Fav-ray. Packers by 10.

 San Diego Chargers vs. Minnesota Vikings
Is this a real game? The Chargers have no choice but to run all over the Vikings. Not because the Chargers are so fantastic this season, but because the Vikings are pretty much a one man show. Adrian Peterson will not carry this team to a win, Chargers by 17.

 Jacksonville Jaguars vs. New Orleans Saints
I know, I was a big Saints supporter earlier in the season. Then the one week I picked against them they stabbed me in the back and had the nerve to win that week. It made me like them a lot less. However this week, I’m choosing the Jaguars because they are AFC, which makes them superior. Jags by 10.

 Arizona Cardinals vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
The Cardinals need a win to stay competitive in their division (which is the WORST in the NFL, tied to the AFC East in the suck category face it, beyond the Pats that division blows). Needless to say, this week won’t be the week that they become competitive. The Cardinals have more drama than a junior high girl’s basketball team and I think the Bucs are perfectly capable of taking the W this week. Tampa Bay by 14.

 Carolina Panthers vs. Tennessee Titans
The Titans will win. Because all the Panthers have to rely on is David Carr and Vinny Testaverde. Wow, suck and old. Great combo. I don’t think Vince Young and the Titans will have any trouble rolling on this week. Titans by 10.

 San Francisco 49’ers vs. Atlanta Falcons
Who even cares about this game? Two teams who are mildly talented at best, and even without big Byron (emphasis on the big), the Falcons can easily over power the 49’ers. This is Joey’s chance to resurrect his career..wait, I don’t think Jesus can resurrect this career. Falcons by 3.

 Washington Redskins vs. New York Jets
Eric Mangini has finally come to his senses. Much like the rest of New York I suppose he’s tired of watching Chad Pennington suck. By no means does any of this mean that the Jets will win, it will just look prettier when they lose. Let’s be honest, the Redskins aren’t going to get blown out two weeks in a row, and losing to the Jets even by one is like a blow out, because they are that bad. Redskins by 17.

 Seattle Seahawks vs. Cleveland Browns
I’d love to see the Seahawks walk all over the Browns, but in this football apocalyptic day and age, that may not happen. I know, I’m shocked too. The Seahawks should be well rested after their bye week. Rested enough to win by 7.

 New England Patriots vs. Indianapolis Colts
Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard all the hype. Here’s the deal: dirty cheaters or not, the Patriots are not human. NOT human. I think Teddy Bruschi is actually made out of titanium. Actually, I think that all of the Patriots are robots. Except Randy Moss, who’s only a play maker when he’s pacified by lots of passes from his QB. The Colts however are human, and Marvin Harrison might not even play this week. It hurts me because I hate the Patriots, but the Colts will lose this week…by 10..at least.

 Houston Texans vs. Oakland Raiders
After a fantastic start, the Texans have returned the team we remember. This is probably Sage Rosenfels fault too, because he’s a boy named Sage, how emasculating.  That being said, Sage is looking to snap the Houston losing streak, and his chances are good considering they are playing the Raiders. The Raiders roster should really be full of guys named Sage. Houston by 3.

 Dallas Cowboys vs. Philadelphia Eagles
T.O. returns to Philly, no one cares. Sorry T.O., but you’re getting lost in the Colts-Pats shuffle this week, and rightly so..because you fail to impress me on a regular basis. What will impress me this week is if Donovan McNabb doesn’t end up injured. This mildly impresses me every week. The Eagles are in a do or die situation, and I have the feeling they’re just going to die. At least this week. Dallas by 20.

 Baltimore Ravens vs. Pittsburgh Steelers
Brian Billick will have more to grump about this week after the Ravens lose to the Steelers. Let’s face it, the last time we all saw Steve McNair he looked ugly. The last time we saw the Ravens they were busy losing to the Bills. While it might not be a blow out, the Ravens only chance of survival is if Ray Lewis calls in some favors from a few friends. Yeah, I said it. Steelers by 14.

 In related news, did you see Eli’s rushing TD last week? U-G-L-Y. Eli, do us a favor, don’t run. It’s not pretty, it’s kinda slow..and honestly, at least 58% of Americans were embarrassed by that. Though, not nearly as embarrassed as we are by the Dolphins. Who are lucky enough to spare themselves further heartbreak with a bye this week.

This is my open letter to Bill Scowler

Dear Scowler,

Are you an idiot? Last week during the pre-game show on CBS you stated that the Patriots would NOT score 30 points against that outstanding Redskins defense. Well, you were sort of right. They didn’t score 30 points, they scored 52 mostly unanswered points. The Patriots had guys on the field I’d never heard of, and Matt Cassel rushed for a touchdown. That’s some outstanding defense Washington. Two thumbs up on that call, Coach. How about you leave the crystal ball stuff to me, ok?